Sunday, December 05, 2010

December...

i don't know what to title this so just decided not to

i have a cold and this post nasal drip is KILLING me...like really its bothering me like crazy

and every now and then it gets really bad and the coughing begins

but my mind is running

i think a lot of people go through this at the end of the year

you start assessing, evaluating things to see what things you grew from and what things you would be just find leaving behind in 2010...

this was written to me last year:

Anonymous said...

You really have a lot going for you right now. I know it gets hard when your lonely but it's not your time to share your life with some one yet. In due time you will and he will be more than you ever wanted in a man. Concentrate on doing you now for thats where GOD wants you to be. With all of my Love, peace

and nothing has changed this year i am pretty much at the same place

so i really have to evaluate where i am and moving forward

so that's where i am right now

i am in the midst of assessing a lot of things and you know what a lot of my decisions would be a whole lot easier if it wasn't for my heart

the bible warns that the heart is a traitorous thing

and boy oh boy is it right

see because common sense and logic can play in all it wants but once the heart has its mind set on something you can get stuck

well i can't get stuck we have already been there when i have made it really clear that i can NOT fall back on my face when it comes to the L word

it just can't happen and i won't let it happen

I have been through WAY too much for me to have to deal with this type of foolishness at this point in my life at this age

so a lot of praying and soul searching has to be done on my part in terms of what it is what i want to do because leaving this behind in 2010 will be HUGE and it will mean turning away from a possible future

but that's the thing, possibilities are great when you have something to hope and have faith in but faith without works is dead and words are just that words they don't mean much without the effort

so December is going to be a huge month for me and it will definitely prove to be one that will set a course for 2011, for better or for worse