that's the name of the class that i just finished taking...
it was awesome it was a combination of ti-chi (probably didn't spell that right), yoga and pilates...
it was totally awesome!
it was hard of course, because there is a lot of balance and the moves are very controlled, but it totally centered me...
yesterday was my friday...and i am looking forward to just relaxing-working out and relaxing
i started my healthy eating lifestyle change last week and this week i started my working out addition....
i am proud because i am really gradually making it a daily routine type of thing...working out makes me feel refreshed and rejuvinated! at the end of the class we just did deep breathing exercises i really really liked that...i think i am going to try to do that every evening just do some deep breathing it centers you
that's what i needed to be centered, i am going to keep working towards that being centered there is a peace that comes over you when you are totally centered...
well off to a salad and some tea!
ohhhhhh here's a little honey for the tea
true soul & funk lives!
have a great day
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Monday, January 28, 2008
truly rAndomneSS
why does life have to be so complicated at times?
i mean you just go through life and you know you think you know but you really don't know, and that understanding of the phrase "a wise man knows that he knows nothing at all" becomes even more real and just because it becomes real doesn't mean that you necessarily know how to deal with it
this week is a short week for me, i need it, i need a little 4 day weekend, but what to do?
i did make a lunch date with one of my sistah friends for Friday...i know i'll be in yoga as many times as i can get in there this weekend...
why does this whole lifestyle change thing keep me feeling hungry ALL the time! Cutting and counting calories sucks! so i just keep drinking water, but that keeps me going to the bathroom...that sucks!
despite the ups and downs of my life, personal life, i seem to be growing in the sense that I am able to leave the stress outside of the door...i can be blown all the way up to the door, but then once i enter i let it go...then at the end of the day it comes back but still...
work has been kicking my butt but its cool....learning you know
my mother is workin on some things on her side...ummmm wonder what will come of that...
i did nothing at all this weekend...well actually just on saturday...i stayed IN MY HOUSE and did NOTHING all day!
sunday i went to a "dress party" for one of the two weddings i am in this year...it was cute we tried on our dresses for alterations...I don't need to have any done! that's good and in a way bad, i want it to be taken in by the end...so if i get on my job it'll happen
i really want to work on my arms! i want to have sexy arms for the wedding!
why does politics have to be so dirty...SMH...i jus want someone to go in there and shake some stuff up and make it happen
i was feeling a little blue so i went a bought some BCBG suede pumps! banging! only $70 that was AWESOME!
my hair is cornrowed right now...because i was tired of the press and curl...i wanted to put my hair up to also jump start my workout plan (shot out to Kanye) HA!
i am honestly bitter about some stuff right now...i don't like feeling bitter and i am bitter because you are bitter...but what do you expect me to do, at some point i have to step back from the situation and do what's best for me...all the way around...
what the hell does "i love you for what you are not" mean????
i get the whole "i love you for the right reasons" but that other saying if you will...me no get, me no likey!
i have been so busy at work i have missed a number of Kiamsha meetings...that's gonna have to give, me being busy with work or sick, they gotta get ready for their conference and i gotta be there
i need a side hustle BAD!
music just really lifts my soul!
another grant due.....ugggggggg
but good experience
why do i love the golden girls and reba on lifetime...
i love cleanhouse, pretty much anything on style and HGTV too!
and you already know i love LA Ink!
oh, after the dress party i went to holla at my parents...i love it when its all four of us, me, my parents and my brother! we talk so much trash and laugh and joke with each other...good times! them is my people!
i mean you just go through life and you know you think you know but you really don't know, and that understanding of the phrase "a wise man knows that he knows nothing at all" becomes even more real and just because it becomes real doesn't mean that you necessarily know how to deal with it
this week is a short week for me, i need it, i need a little 4 day weekend, but what to do?
i did make a lunch date with one of my sistah friends for Friday...i know i'll be in yoga as many times as i can get in there this weekend...
why does this whole lifestyle change thing keep me feeling hungry ALL the time! Cutting and counting calories sucks! so i just keep drinking water, but that keeps me going to the bathroom...that sucks!
despite the ups and downs of my life, personal life, i seem to be growing in the sense that I am able to leave the stress outside of the door...i can be blown all the way up to the door, but then once i enter i let it go...then at the end of the day it comes back but still...
work has been kicking my butt but its cool....learning you know
my mother is workin on some things on her side...ummmm wonder what will come of that...
i did nothing at all this weekend...well actually just on saturday...i stayed IN MY HOUSE and did NOTHING all day!
sunday i went to a "dress party" for one of the two weddings i am in this year...it was cute we tried on our dresses for alterations...I don't need to have any done! that's good and in a way bad, i want it to be taken in by the end...so if i get on my job it'll happen
i really want to work on my arms! i want to have sexy arms for the wedding!
why does politics have to be so dirty...SMH...i jus want someone to go in there and shake some stuff up and make it happen
i was feeling a little blue so i went a bought some BCBG suede pumps! banging! only $70 that was AWESOME!
my hair is cornrowed right now...because i was tired of the press and curl...i wanted to put my hair up to also jump start my workout plan (shot out to Kanye) HA!
i am honestly bitter about some stuff right now...i don't like feeling bitter and i am bitter because you are bitter...but what do you expect me to do, at some point i have to step back from the situation and do what's best for me...all the way around...
what the hell does "i love you for what you are not" mean????
i get the whole "i love you for the right reasons" but that other saying if you will...me no get, me no likey!
i have been so busy at work i have missed a number of Kiamsha meetings...that's gonna have to give, me being busy with work or sick, they gotta get ready for their conference and i gotta be there
i need a side hustle BAD!
music just really lifts my soul!
another grant due.....ugggggggg
but good experience
why do i love the golden girls and reba on lifetime...
i love cleanhouse, pretty much anything on style and HGTV too!
and you already know i love LA Ink!
oh, after the dress party i went to holla at my parents...i love it when its all four of us, me, my parents and my brother! we talk so much trash and laugh and joke with each other...good times! them is my people!
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
new music
so music really is a window into my soul...
if you like or love music you have GOT to check out this new artist, well she has been out for a while...
Emily King she is totally an awesome artist, grammy nominated as a matter a fact!
check out her video "walk in my shoes" (i so wish i could post this vid) when i say i am totally FEELING this song! I am totally feeling this song...
check her out
additionally check out Deemi...soundtrack of my life...
this is just what i needed today...
if you like or love music you have GOT to check out this new artist, well she has been out for a while...
Emily King she is totally an awesome artist, grammy nominated as a matter a fact!
check out her video "walk in my shoes" (i so wish i could post this vid) when i say i am totally FEELING this song! I am totally feeling this song...
check her out
additionally check out Deemi...soundtrack of my life...
this is just what i needed today...
Tuesday, January 22, 2008
i have a lot to say but not really
so i really have a lot to say but i have either been really busy or when i am not i just want to be
otherwise I just have not been inspired to blog or had the time to really put my thoughts out there...because i am to tired from that thing called LIFE that i just want to chill
or i have just been working on some personal relationship stuff with me, my GOD, my family, my gurls, or me love....
yesterday was a day to just "be" and reflect on life, my legacy and what i want it to be, and the scarifcies that have been made by my people specifically and the human race as a whole...how 40 years later after the death of Dr. Martin Luther King we have come so far but we still have so very far to go...stories of the struggles that my grandparents and even parents had to endure all so that i could have an education just amazes me...i have a BA, a MPA, and eventually i WILL have a PhD...all because of the blood sweat and tears that my family and others have made for me
furthermore the truth is that we are in fact IN a recession right now, but i have a job, i struggle, but i have money in my account and food to eat and a warm bed to lay down in at night...we have a Black man and a Woman running for president (i'll keep my personal pick to myself) but that's just a sign that change is coming, but the "cheap shots" being taken by all parties still shows that a change still needs to come...
more to say about politics but the main point is that we need to forever remain greatful for where we are and where we CAN go...if we chose to...
peace
otherwise I just have not been inspired to blog or had the time to really put my thoughts out there...because i am to tired from that thing called LIFE that i just want to chill
or i have just been working on some personal relationship stuff with me, my GOD, my family, my gurls, or me love....
yesterday was a day to just "be" and reflect on life, my legacy and what i want it to be, and the scarifcies that have been made by my people specifically and the human race as a whole...how 40 years later after the death of Dr. Martin Luther King we have come so far but we still have so very far to go...stories of the struggles that my grandparents and even parents had to endure all so that i could have an education just amazes me...i have a BA, a MPA, and eventually i WILL have a PhD...all because of the blood sweat and tears that my family and others have made for me
furthermore the truth is that we are in fact IN a recession right now, but i have a job, i struggle, but i have money in my account and food to eat and a warm bed to lay down in at night...we have a Black man and a Woman running for president (i'll keep my personal pick to myself) but that's just a sign that change is coming, but the "cheap shots" being taken by all parties still shows that a change still needs to come...
more to say about politics but the main point is that we need to forever remain greatful for where we are and where we CAN go...if we chose to...
peace
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
i must admit
i love everything that is ms. badu, she is honestly everything FREE that i totally want to be... if i could dress like this everyday i would...i love funky stuff like this...i dress honestly, funky as often as i can...but i must admit that i have gotten swept up in the whole classic look from time to time, and so there are certain things that i now want purchase like classic wrap dresses and stuff like that...
of course this need for a "make over" comes form my new most favs show "how to look good naked" have you seen it?
i luv luv luv that show! me and me love watched it (yes he actually watched it with me this weekend in between or before a game) even he liked the show...
anywho i really luv the concept of just getting women to appreciate and love the skin that they are in. me love asked "babe, so when do they exercise?" and i had to inform him that they don't! the concept and premise of the show is that okay THIS is the body that YOU ARE IN, how do you look your best!
that's what i luv! no fade diets, the host take women through a total self evaluation, inside out to just accept who they are...and its beautiful to me! so in 08 that's part of my evolution, to just accept TC! i am not a size 6 hell i am not a size 12 but i love the skin i am in...and YES i need to eat better and exercise for my health NOT to be skinny!
and imma keep it funky at all times!
Thursday, January 10, 2008
Tagged AGAIN
The rules of the game are:
A). Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog...
B). Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself...
C). Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs...
D). Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
I was tagged by a truly deep sistah over at DeepNThought
Two Names I go by:
1. T-i don't know why people just started calling me that...
2. Tip, Tippy-my little big sis started calling me that as a play on my name
Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1. brown dress
2. multi-colored sweater
Two Things You Would Want (or have) in a Relationship:
1. open, honest, loving communication-i want him to be my best firend!
2. compassion and passion for something other than himself, sports and money.*now of course I’d like to add more but…it’s a list of TWO things only.
Two of your favorite things to do:
1. write
2. Laugh
Two things you want very badly at the moment:
1. to finish this project I am working on so that I can move to the next
2. his arms around me
3. a raise
Two pets you had/have:
1. princess-she was my roc (my dad had one too, but he was mean as hell so no one could go near him but my father, IN FACT he attacked my brother once for thinking he was going to attack my dad) anyways that was my heart....
2. red-he was the family dog and a mut/nut...he hung himself....
Two people you think will fill this out: I really have no idea
1. maybe BAP
2. maybe jac
Things that you did last night:
1) worked late
2) went to bed
Two things you ate today:
1. egg, bacon and red pepper sandwhich
2. fruit salad
Two people you last talked to:
1. my honey
2. my bestest
Two things you're doing tomorrow:
1. Working
2. and working
Two longest car rides:
1. MD to AL
2. AL to TX
Two favorite holidays: i really don't have one but if i have to pick
1. My Birthday (YES it is a national holiday for me...LOL)
2. thanksgiving
Favorite beverages:
1. water
2. sweat tea
Person no longer alive who you'd like to talk to:
1. my ganddaddy
2. My father's parents whom i never had the pleasure of meeting
I am tagging so get your panties out of a bunchSo I’m tagging the folks whose page I stalk on the regular: jac, BAP, it is what it is, danger, dc, teej, mikesee
A). Link to the person that tagged you and post the rules on your blog...
B). Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself...
C). Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs...
D). Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.
I was tagged by a truly deep sistah over at DeepNThought
Two Names I go by:
1. T-i don't know why people just started calling me that...
2. Tip, Tippy-my little big sis started calling me that as a play on my name
Two Things You Are Wearing Right Now:
1. brown dress
2. multi-colored sweater
Two Things You Would Want (or have) in a Relationship:
1. open, honest, loving communication-i want him to be my best firend!
2. compassion and passion for something other than himself, sports and money.*now of course I’d like to add more but…it’s a list of TWO things only.
Two of your favorite things to do:
1. write
2. Laugh
Two things you want very badly at the moment:
1. to finish this project I am working on so that I can move to the next
2. his arms around me
3. a raise
Two pets you had/have:
1. princess-she was my roc (my dad had one too, but he was mean as hell so no one could go near him but my father, IN FACT he attacked my brother once for thinking he was going to attack my dad) anyways that was my heart....
2. red-he was the family dog and a mut/nut...he hung himself....
Two people you think will fill this out: I really have no idea
1. maybe BAP
2. maybe jac
Things that you did last night:
1) worked late
2) went to bed
Two things you ate today:
1. egg, bacon and red pepper sandwhich
2. fruit salad
Two people you last talked to:
1. my honey
2. my bestest
Two things you're doing tomorrow:
1. Working
2. and working
Two longest car rides:
1. MD to AL
2. AL to TX
Two favorite holidays: i really don't have one but if i have to pick
1. My Birthday (YES it is a national holiday for me...LOL)
2. thanksgiving
Favorite beverages:
1. water
2. sweat tea
Person no longer alive who you'd like to talk to:
1. my ganddaddy
2. My father's parents whom i never had the pleasure of meeting
I am tagging so get your panties out of a bunchSo I’m tagging the folks whose page I stalk on the regular: jac, BAP, it is what it is, danger, dc, teej, mikesee
Monday, January 07, 2008
Bucket List
view the preview clip below before reading
okay you finished...
so that leads me to my post...or maybe its my question
why is it that we have to wait until we have worked hard, or have retired, or are "seasoned", or in this case receive a notice of "you only have a few months to live" before we actually LIVE!
me and him got into an argument about going out, it was really and still seems totally unnecessary to me, but hey what i can say i guess it the perspective that others see...
to him it makes since to work and then invest, and that's cool, but you work and invest ALL of your money that makes NO sense to me...you invest and you have fun, you enjoy...that's my thing...why not enjoy yourself NOW...do both, invest/save, and enjoy...do it all...
always thinking about tomorrow you'll miss today... (tc 2008)
we are all young, we are working hard to make a mark in the specfic industry and to make a "name" so to speak....but if all you do is work and hustle all the time, life will pass you by and that's something that i don't want to happen to me...i want to travel and eat different foods and see different places...i really do...
last night was watching a show on TLC, LA Ink (one of my most FAV shows, by the way when i go to LA in June for our National Convention, I am going to get a portrait of my Daddy tatooed on my side, i know but hey he is going to be right on my left side next to my heart...you may call me crazy, but whatev that's my man...oh yea the artists are just that and they ROCK) and she was young, really young and she had a cancer scare so she got a compass on her leg and decided that for the rest of her life she would visit a country a year...i thought that was AWESOME...why wait until later make time NOW to enjoy your life...
so to me i want to make my bucket list NOW (what ya'll think????)
we should live NOW...make our marks all the way
so in the year of the next level make yours count...
UPDATE: My Bucket List
*go on at least one vacation biannually (imma be real and knowing that i shouldn't be taking HUGE vacations yearly-but travel to a new country every vacation and really get out in the world and see it, i want to go to AFRICA (south and ivory coast & Egypt (YES it IS apart of Africa)), Italy, Germany, Japan, China, Great Britain, Canada (i'll proably start here) and of course the islands and Hawaii)
*go on a mini vaca annually
*budgie jump
*sky dive
*see my grandmother at least once a year
*visit my parents as much as i can (when they move to AL, now i see the all the time)
*invest at least 10% of my income for my future and my children's future
*eat out as much as my budget will allow and NEW and DIFFERENT places (i love to eat)
*buy classic pieces of jewelry
*buy classic pieces of clothes, bags and shoes
*live in everyday and just enjoy
okay you finished...
so that leads me to my post...or maybe its my question
why is it that we have to wait until we have worked hard, or have retired, or are "seasoned", or in this case receive a notice of "you only have a few months to live" before we actually LIVE!
me and him got into an argument about going out, it was really and still seems totally unnecessary to me, but hey what i can say i guess it the perspective that others see...
to him it makes since to work and then invest, and that's cool, but you work and invest ALL of your money that makes NO sense to me...you invest and you have fun, you enjoy...that's my thing...why not enjoy yourself NOW...do both, invest/save, and enjoy...do it all...
always thinking about tomorrow you'll miss today... (tc 2008)
we are all young, we are working hard to make a mark in the specfic industry and to make a "name" so to speak....but if all you do is work and hustle all the time, life will pass you by and that's something that i don't want to happen to me...i want to travel and eat different foods and see different places...i really do...
last night was watching a show on TLC, LA Ink (one of my most FAV shows, by the way when i go to LA in June for our National Convention, I am going to get a portrait of my Daddy tatooed on my side, i know but hey he is going to be right on my left side next to my heart...you may call me crazy, but whatev that's my man...oh yea the artists are just that and they ROCK) and she was young, really young and she had a cancer scare so she got a compass on her leg and decided that for the rest of her life she would visit a country a year...i thought that was AWESOME...why wait until later make time NOW to enjoy your life...
so to me i want to make my bucket list NOW (what ya'll think????)
we should live NOW...make our marks all the way
so in the year of the next level make yours count...
UPDATE: My Bucket List
*go on at least one vacation biannually (imma be real and knowing that i shouldn't be taking HUGE vacations yearly-but travel to a new country every vacation and really get out in the world and see it, i want to go to AFRICA (south and ivory coast & Egypt (YES it IS apart of Africa)), Italy, Germany, Japan, China, Great Britain, Canada (i'll proably start here) and of course the islands and Hawaii)
*go on a mini vaca annually
*budgie jump
*sky dive
*see my grandmother at least once a year
*visit my parents as much as i can (when they move to AL, now i see the all the time)
*invest at least 10% of my income for my future and my children's future
*eat out as much as my budget will allow and NEW and DIFFERENT places (i love to eat)
*buy classic pieces of jewelry
*buy classic pieces of clothes, bags and shoes
*live in everyday and just enjoy
Thursday, January 03, 2008
rAndomneSS
okay so why was the lady on the train this morning talking totally loud with her raspy voice...but i liked it...
why is it that i go to sleep on the train coming and going...did i mention i got off at LFant Plaza once thinking it was Metro Center...went upstairs and everything...
my hair looks like Jennifer Hudson's new due...so you know that i love the fact that i am fashion forward and had this cut for Christmas
what can i say, i am ahead of my time...which leads me to the fact that i totally, if i had the money would be FLY...but would we all be fly if we had the money...well i would and its not about the gucci or chanel, even though i love that, its about the CLASSIC pieces you know...the pumps, boots, bags...gloves...i love shopping can't you tell, BUT i am trying to get OUT of debt so no shopping for me
okay so why was Raz B and his brother out with Chris Stokes last night at dinner, saying "we love each other man"...SMH....it really pisses me off because i personally know people that have been molested, so its not something that i take lightly, its not something that most people take lightly...so i don't know what the situation is, but i just pray for those who suffer with the pain, anger, hurt and shame that they feel from having been gone through it or going through it or any abusive relationship
its sick you know...its just sick
my annual review is next week, cross your fingers for me, i need to come up
i am in 2 weddings this year and there are 4 already planned (including the 2) that i must attend AND i think there will be another...i guess its that time of my life..what can i say...maybe one day when i grow up i'll get there...HA!
speaking of growing up...i guess its something we must all do
how about my homeboy sent me an email today to remind me that my name is being called out on an old Groovers go-go tape...it was like 98, and i was apart of the bout it bout it honies...yea i know, wasn't nothing that bout it about me or us...we wasn't scared or faking (as the youngins would say now but back then we just went out and had a good time, wasn't like it is now) but we totally got the name because my girl went to some summer program and came back singing Master P...so we became the bout it bout it honies...CLASSIC...
and here it is dag on near 10 years later and i hear "where those bout it bout it honies....happy birthday tc" and i KNOW they are talking about me...
at least that was 1o years ago and i am not up in the go-go now getting my name hollered out over the mic at 27 years old...CLEARLY just because its the Positive Black Man's Annual Night of Elegance does NOT make it alright...
i am too funny...
anywho...that's about all that's going on with me nothing much..
peace
Wednesday, January 02, 2008
2nd day
so today is the second day of the year and guess what?!
i am feeling GREAT
i started off the new year where i needed to be, in CHURCH that's right in church and it was awesome!
Good message, good people, nice fireworks (yes my pastor had fireworks to bring in 08...), cranking (yes i said cranking-our choir does "traditional" as well as non-traditional gospel, which includes gospel go-go...so it was cranking jo...)
and i went dolo solo...i needed to, i needed to clear my head and connect heart to heart with my higher being for myself...not focusing on anything or anyone else or what they were feeling or doing, just me and my GOD...it was much needed and is why i feel so full and light at the same time...i had to reflect on some things, you know a lot of times, people see you one way, you see yourself another, and both ways aren't accurate at all...so TC had to look at TC, reflect and take the good, the bad and the fugly and say OK, well this is what I want to do...the truth is i didn't even come up with any goals for 08, or any dreams or anything like that for 2008...what i got out of it all was to just appreciate ME for ME and know that i make good decisions, good choices, that i do see the total picture and that i am strong enough to ask for help or to even admit when i am wrong...i can truly look at me and be alright with ME! and that is a lesson in and of itself...i mean let's just be honest here, no one person is perfect, you can sit and act like you aren but you aren't...furthermore, as you live and love, you hopefully are learning...things aren't always what they seem is true, but you'll know what's true and what's not...so i decided to just take everything ONE day at a time, ONE step in pray in a moment and just be alright with it, because truth be told life could always be worse and Jehovah GOD is GREAT! so its just up to me to make the most of life and live...NO expectations, NO plan (because its not up to me anyways)
my goal is to just be the best tc i can be, at work, at home, in my family, in my friendships, in love...just give my best!
and be alright when its not good enough, revamp and go at it again....
If you do not ever fail, then your goals are not nearly ambitious enough. If you do not come across new challenges on a regular basis, your abilities and effectiveness will become stale and weak.
Comfort is a good state in which to find rest, renewal and refuge for a while. It is a dreary and dismal place to take up permanent residence.
The reason life can be so rich is precisely because it can be so difficult. You cannot possibly appreciate or fully benefit from the good things if you have no experience with the bad things.
When your efforts are met with failure, you know you are on to something. Because on the other side of that failure is real and substantive accomplishment.
Seek not to create failure, nor to avoid failure. Seek instead to allow failure, when it comes, to keep you moving on the path to greater success.
Failure confirms that you are reaching higher. And higher is always the best direction to reach.
-- Ralph Marston
anyways enough of that...
the first day of the year was spent running around and spending time with my honey...for some reason at the end of the year, we hit a rough patch but we kept fighting to come to some sort of understanding, actually i'll take that back, me and this dude have gone at it from the start, two strong people, it wasn't your typical as my girls would say "drama free first year" we shattered the rose colored glasses off the break...and it proved to be trying at times to say the least...its like our first year was in the the first month or so and then we went through the ugliest sides of each other, having to admit somethings about ourselves (Thank Goodness i didn't even have to start that conversation) and coming to a good place....
but by golly if on 1/1/08 we didn't have this rhythm going...its like the guy i met, and i am sure he feels like, this is the girl i met...and yes i'll admit it, i fell totally IN love again, with him, all over again, and its a wonderful thing...he has said that he feeds off of me and since my attitude has gone from stressing and trying to analyze it all TO whatever will be will be, i am just going to love as hard for as long as i can, he has been doing the same thing...and we are progressing...it's not always going to be easy, but we are finding that its really not that hard...just letting go and letting it flow works (maybe i'll try this in life in general...LOL)
i am feeling GREAT
i started off the new year where i needed to be, in CHURCH that's right in church and it was awesome!
Good message, good people, nice fireworks (yes my pastor had fireworks to bring in 08...), cranking (yes i said cranking-our choir does "traditional" as well as non-traditional gospel, which includes gospel go-go...so it was cranking jo...)
and i went dolo solo...i needed to, i needed to clear my head and connect heart to heart with my higher being for myself...not focusing on anything or anyone else or what they were feeling or doing, just me and my GOD...it was much needed and is why i feel so full and light at the same time...i had to reflect on some things, you know a lot of times, people see you one way, you see yourself another, and both ways aren't accurate at all...so TC had to look at TC, reflect and take the good, the bad and the fugly and say OK, well this is what I want to do...the truth is i didn't even come up with any goals for 08, or any dreams or anything like that for 2008...what i got out of it all was to just appreciate ME for ME and know that i make good decisions, good choices, that i do see the total picture and that i am strong enough to ask for help or to even admit when i am wrong...i can truly look at me and be alright with ME! and that is a lesson in and of itself...i mean let's just be honest here, no one person is perfect, you can sit and act like you aren but you aren't...furthermore, as you live and love, you hopefully are learning...things aren't always what they seem is true, but you'll know what's true and what's not...so i decided to just take everything ONE day at a time, ONE step in pray in a moment and just be alright with it, because truth be told life could always be worse and Jehovah GOD is GREAT! so its just up to me to make the most of life and live...NO expectations, NO plan (because its not up to me anyways)
my goal is to just be the best tc i can be, at work, at home, in my family, in my friendships, in love...just give my best!
and be alright when its not good enough, revamp and go at it again....
If you do not ever fail, then your goals are not nearly ambitious enough. If you do not come across new challenges on a regular basis, your abilities and effectiveness will become stale and weak.
Comfort is a good state in which to find rest, renewal and refuge for a while. It is a dreary and dismal place to take up permanent residence.
The reason life can be so rich is precisely because it can be so difficult. You cannot possibly appreciate or fully benefit from the good things if you have no experience with the bad things.
When your efforts are met with failure, you know you are on to something. Because on the other side of that failure is real and substantive accomplishment.
Seek not to create failure, nor to avoid failure. Seek instead to allow failure, when it comes, to keep you moving on the path to greater success.
Failure confirms that you are reaching higher. And higher is always the best direction to reach.
-- Ralph Marston
anyways enough of that...
the first day of the year was spent running around and spending time with my honey...for some reason at the end of the year, we hit a rough patch but we kept fighting to come to some sort of understanding, actually i'll take that back, me and this dude have gone at it from the start, two strong people, it wasn't your typical as my girls would say "drama free first year" we shattered the rose colored glasses off the break...and it proved to be trying at times to say the least...its like our first year was in the the first month or so and then we went through the ugliest sides of each other, having to admit somethings about ourselves (Thank Goodness i didn't even have to start that conversation) and coming to a good place....
but by golly if on 1/1/08 we didn't have this rhythm going...its like the guy i met, and i am sure he feels like, this is the girl i met...and yes i'll admit it, i fell totally IN love again, with him, all over again, and its a wonderful thing...he has said that he feeds off of me and since my attitude has gone from stressing and trying to analyze it all TO whatever will be will be, i am just going to love as hard for as long as i can, he has been doing the same thing...and we are progressing...it's not always going to be easy, but we are finding that its really not that hard...just letting go and letting it flow works (maybe i'll try this in life in general...LOL)
as i look back, i have had some ups and downs but i am proud of where i am, i am working hard at work, i am getting back on track spiritually, i am working with some things to get my money right...
so i just look forward to the new year...it might not always be perfect, or easy, and i may go through somethings but i am blessed...all you can do is be YOU and let it fall into place, you can't worry about what others say or think, you just keep pressing, doing what's right and what's real in YOUR heart!
i have much more to say, but i got work to do...so happy new year everyone!
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