Wednesday, April 18, 2007

Corporate GF

so i just realized something...

I am a corporate girlfriend (OK for most of you, you didn't know it was official...YES I have a boyfriend...and YES its weird to say after being dolo for 2 years...but anywho)

He is a Director for Research & Development for a large bio-chemical firm in Maryland, actually its a global firm that is based out of Germany, which means that he will be flying there at LEAST (could be more) twice a year, and flying across the country and world for various other meetings, workshops, conventions, conferences, you name it he has to go...

At first it wasn't so bad, but his travel scheule has started to pick up....the travel is set to slow down after his current trip...but still

the current trip is to Atlanta and he won't be back until the 29th...yes the 29th...
he just left yesterday...

so here is the other compounded issue...

he lives in Reston, VA...which from Bowie, MD is like a whole nother world...45 mins-hour away...

we rarely (NO we do NOT) see each other during the week, because he is working, I am working, he is tutoring, and I tutoring/mentoring and doing Kiamsha stuff...

so that leaves the weekends...and a lot of phone conversation...which for the most part WORKS for us...


I care about this man, like deeply, in your soul type of connection type, on my mind all the time type stuff...that's my homie, my boi, my friend, my ace, he's really a GREAT GUY (yea I know deep right)

i mean really he gets me...if that makes sense, he can put up with me and put me in my place (i have an extremely powerful personality, i am extremely complex as well and get beside myself at times...so i need a man with a strong personality that can pull me back) without demeaning me...we have had our ups and downs but that's my homie

But now I am starting to really think...

like if this is going somewhere (which I hope it is, and we are starting to talk about "the future") then what is going to happen if I become a corporate wife?????

Like seriously...can I handle him being away for weeks at a time? Handling the house and the kids and life just me with out him? only for him to be on the other end of a phone? seriously can i handle this? don't i want a man that can have dinner with his family every night? or be at home to help me tuck in the kids? heck tuck his WIFE in?

*deep breath*

We had a serious conversation about 2 weeks ago and he was really feeling some type of way about his schedule and the time we would be able to spend together, and that it would really hard on the both of us....i totally reassured him that I would be supportive and understanding and we WOULD definitely get through this...especially the next 7 months or so as he get adjusted to his job...

man, 7 months, that's a long time...11 days apart is a long time...

now don't get it twisted ...I do NOT regret my decision (life is too short for regrets)

he is a good guy...we could honestly grow together, we have a lot in common but enough about us is different that we are constantly learning from each other, we talk, laugh, joke, do the dozens...

but man...can I really be a corporate girlfriend? this is going to require a lot of trust? but i do trust him, i couldn't be with him if I didn't (been there done that...no point)

i know what it is i am having a moment...i am sitting here thinking and missing him and having a moment...i am definitely going to be patient, understanding and supportive just like i said i would...

i just needed to get this out...this is the first time that i have been in this situation, my last "real" relationship was long distance and i just got used to NOT seeing him, but i am older now and need attention and time spent with that special someone in my life...but if that special someone is going to be in corporate ameriKa then that means that i have to get used to this...used to be home alone, used to depending on the phone...that's a lot to get used to...

to be continued....definitely

...any tips, hints, input on this one?

7 comments:

Honey-Libra said...

WOW...I'm sure you have thought about moving closer right...being that you work in DC even if it's just to alexandria it's still closer...I mean what else can you do other than talk about the issue, know that you want to spend more time with him, but hey work is work and right now your not a wife LOL (sike let me stop)

I feel ya though..for once I'm shut mouth (which is rare)

A woman on the move said...

I say go for it! Seriously what do you have to loose?
Besides, I think the built up energy and anticipation brings a profound excitement. The loving would always be HOT (good sex is important, LOL).

45 minutes isn’t too bad (in my opinion). It could be worst. I find myself eating my words when I say I want a man who is consumed in his passion/work. Yet, sometimes I feel neglected when Mr. Godiva can’t see me because he’s working.

Have fun and do the damn thing!!!!!!!!
Like you said LIFE IS TOO SHORT!

Daneger said...

Eeewwwww, you contracted that disease too! When did this happen? (I'm refering to becoming a GF...LOL)

T.C. said...

@honey-no im not the wife yet, but i gotta be real with myself in terms of whether or not i COULD...(does that make sense?)

@awotm-you are right! But man...

@dane-i don't know a while now actually...

jus butterfli said...

well, ladybug...

you got a lotta shit on your mind these days, huh?

well, i know you have to write it all out in order to clear your mind; but, you know what i think already. tell it to Daddy and then jus live!! he'll take care of the rest and figure that thang out betta than ANY of us can! :)

anyhoo... holla if you need me. you know what time it is! :)

peace, love and BIG hugs.

Consistently Inconsistent... said...

Hey, I just noticed you stopped by my page. I am so late. Sorry! Thanks for stopping by.

Anyway, I too say go for it. I understand what you mean when you say, "I mean really he gets me..if that makes sense,"

that's profound and it rarely happens. That in itself is enough to really juggle the topic.

T.C. said...

@jus-definitely up to GOD...always and forever!

@consistently-it is rare...he makes me smile