maybe its me

really it must be

i just don't feel motivated anymore i really don't

i feel like my life is passing me by and i don't know why

so many feelings and emotions are running through my head and i can't understand why they just won't stop or shut up

there is work that i need to be doing right now, but instead i feel the need to blog...


bloggin is totally my release


i have had more doctor's appointments, tests and crap run on me


i am tired...i mean really tired and i won't have a vacation anytime soon


the thing is everyone wants a piece of me and when i don't give what THEY thing they need from me its a problem...hell i need time for myself too...and it would be nice if i could vent to someone and they TRULY listen for once to what my needs are instead of venturing off into their own needs OR to cursing someone out OR whatever else that they want to do because CLEARLY my issues don't really matter


i am ready to move on in my life, certain things and repsonsiblities i am ready to let go of...the problem is no one is there to step up...but i need to let go, i am in no position to give my all right now, and my body, my spirit and my soul suffer for it why? because simply i am tired!


i don't do anything, which is fine, because basically i am beyond the whole club scene...but i want to read a good book, go to a museum, go to see some "dumb fish" go to a play...i just want to live life...


i have gotten part of my life under control and that's the eating habits and exercise part, which has been most helpful i must admit but at the same time, my skin breaks out...smh...now i have to figure out what in the world caused that..


let me just put it plainly i am stressed out...and some things in my life truly have to go