Friday, February 29, 2008
shake my pom pom
okay now why was in the house shaking my pom pom...i mean i was getting it...grown woman getting it...
missy is on the ONE you hear me!
weekend of silence
from time to time i always say i am going to do NOTHING and then i end up doing SOMETHING
well for once, my body is really trying to tell me, ask me, BEGGGGGG me to do nothing...
still sick, still been coming to work, only took one day off, its time for some R & R...
i may need to head to the store to get some more OJ and healthy snacks but at least for tonight, i'll be at home in my chair doing nothing...
this also comes at a time when i need to do some thinking some mental cleaning as you will...
so many thoughts so many things going on in my head
i do know that i totally have some things in the works for me...positive things at that...so that will be a benefit...for example i just opened up a special savings account with my bank that will yield me a dollar per checkcard purchase so i'll save without even really thinking about it...that's a benefit for me
so yea still moving forward trying my best to do the BIG gurl thang you know and that's not always easy...but my 3pm conference call looks like its not a go...therefore i am about to be OUT this camp!
have a GREAT weekend family...it is in fact Friday so time to just hang out and chill...enjoy
well for once, my body is really trying to tell me, ask me, BEGGGGGG me to do nothing...
still sick, still been coming to work, only took one day off, its time for some R & R...
i may need to head to the store to get some more OJ and healthy snacks but at least for tonight, i'll be at home in my chair doing nothing...
this also comes at a time when i need to do some thinking some mental cleaning as you will...
so many thoughts so many things going on in my head
i do know that i totally have some things in the works for me...positive things at that...so that will be a benefit...for example i just opened up a special savings account with my bank that will yield me a dollar per checkcard purchase so i'll save without even really thinking about it...that's a benefit for me
so yea still moving forward trying my best to do the BIG gurl thang you know and that's not always easy...but my 3pm conference call looks like its not a go...therefore i am about to be OUT this camp!
have a GREAT weekend family...it is in fact Friday so time to just hang out and chill...enjoy
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
sick of being sick
so i have been battling this THANG since i don't know the 11th of the month...what's that two weeks + now...it seems like it just won't go away...and you know why it won't go away becuase my crazy behind keeps working and running around and doing stuff knowing full well i need to be at home in my bed...
well guess what world, i am going to sign off and get right! i can't take this anymore, i at least need a day to rest and get myself together...at least...
so i am going to take a chill pill...
no work, no email, no phone, no NOTHING...
i'll holla in a couple of days....
well guess what world, i am going to sign off and get right! i can't take this anymore, i at least need a day to rest and get myself together...at least...
so i am going to take a chill pill...
no work, no email, no phone, no NOTHING...
i'll holla in a couple of days....
Friday, February 22, 2008
PYT
ok so i have pretty much been busting my butt all week at work today wasn't an exception...
but the thing that GOT me through my day was music
i have been working, reading, writing, editing, selecting, instructing...all with a bounce today at work...
i know i say this all the time...but music is such a key to soul...it can uplift me and totally take me in the direction that i need to go! i love love love music
you're the fire that keeps me warm, how will i get through this storm...
where did you come from baby, and oooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh will you take me there right away...
there's a time of the day when the sun is going down, that's the golden time of day
there is nothing special about me, i am, just a little star, if it seems i am shinning brightly because i am a reflection of what you already are....just trying and trying, its just a matter of timing, though the grinding is tring don't let it stop you from smilin...
it's a family affair...
awwww now....duckey stick
but the thing that GOT me through my day was music
i have been working, reading, writing, editing, selecting, instructing...all with a bounce today at work...
i know i say this all the time...but music is such a key to soul...it can uplift me and totally take me in the direction that i need to go! i love love love music
you're the fire that keeps me warm, how will i get through this storm...
where did you come from baby, and oooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh will you take me there right away...
there's a time of the day when the sun is going down, that's the golden time of day
there is nothing special about me, i am, just a little star, if it seems i am shinning brightly because i am a reflection of what you already are....just trying and trying, its just a matter of timing, though the grinding is tring don't let it stop you from smilin...
it's a family affair...
awwww now....duckey stick
Wednesday, February 20, 2008
friends...
so here is the thing, at what point can males and females, men and women be JUST friends?
that's the question that keeps coming up around me right now...
some times i truly think that people take things to far...
i have heard, "well if i am in a relationship, i can't have any female friends because all my female friends really want to do is f*ck me..."
wow, okay!
i have also heard, "he is strictly my homeboy, we grew up together and have known each other for years...there is nothing there..."
some people refuse, i mean TOTALLY refuse to give up their male or female friends when they enter into a relationship regardless of the level of committment that they have to their partner or regardless of how the partner may feel about it...Why? because they figure this person was here before you and they will be here after you...further more, we are JUST friends!
but are you really...do you secretly wish for more, and if so, aren't you more than friends...
or is it really that this is like my bro/sis type of thang...
why is it so hard for SOME people to accpet their partner having friends...
at some point in a relationship you have trust the person that you are with until proven otherwise...if the person says that they are "just friends" then you should be able to trust that they are just friends...but at what point do you say "hold up this is a bit much"
when your phone rings at 10pm and its a male/female friend calling?
when your text messaging plan has gone over from texting said friend all day long?
when you don't answer your phone when your partner calls because you are with said friend?
what are the levels of friendship and when is it time to step back from friends of the opposite sex, even those that you have known since forever????
what is the definition of a friend?
like i said it seems to me the older we get and the more serious relationships become the issue of friends of the opposite sex become and issue...i mainly think its because of trust...but then the rebuttal to that is, "it's not that i don't trust you, it's the other people that i don't trust because things happen"
well if you trust your partner or their judgement then you should know that they wouldn't put themselves in a situation that would be detramental to your relationship, they wouldn't allow themselve to be in a compromising situation with someone else...
but i guess that again goes back to trust.
why doesn't anyone fully trust anyone anymore? what happened to believing in the person you are with, ESPECIALLY if they haven't proven to do otherwise
maybe if we all started off as friends FIRST in a relationship then we would really know the character of our partners and be able to trust their judgement and be more sound in their friendships...
true others have abused this title of "friends" before and YES sometimes friends become more than that...but if you are in a relationship shouldn't you trust that it won't go down like that?
i don't know people, speak to me
that's the question that keeps coming up around me right now...
some times i truly think that people take things to far...
i have heard, "well if i am in a relationship, i can't have any female friends because all my female friends really want to do is f*ck me..."
wow, okay!
i have also heard, "he is strictly my homeboy, we grew up together and have known each other for years...there is nothing there..."
some people refuse, i mean TOTALLY refuse to give up their male or female friends when they enter into a relationship regardless of the level of committment that they have to their partner or regardless of how the partner may feel about it...Why? because they figure this person was here before you and they will be here after you...further more, we are JUST friends!
but are you really...do you secretly wish for more, and if so, aren't you more than friends...
or is it really that this is like my bro/sis type of thang...
why is it so hard for SOME people to accpet their partner having friends...
at some point in a relationship you have trust the person that you are with until proven otherwise...if the person says that they are "just friends" then you should be able to trust that they are just friends...but at what point do you say "hold up this is a bit much"
when your phone rings at 10pm and its a male/female friend calling?
when your text messaging plan has gone over from texting said friend all day long?
when you don't answer your phone when your partner calls because you are with said friend?
what are the levels of friendship and when is it time to step back from friends of the opposite sex, even those that you have known since forever????
what is the definition of a friend?
like i said it seems to me the older we get and the more serious relationships become the issue of friends of the opposite sex become and issue...i mainly think its because of trust...but then the rebuttal to that is, "it's not that i don't trust you, it's the other people that i don't trust because things happen"
well if you trust your partner or their judgement then you should know that they wouldn't put themselves in a situation that would be detramental to your relationship, they wouldn't allow themselve to be in a compromising situation with someone else...
but i guess that again goes back to trust.
why doesn't anyone fully trust anyone anymore? what happened to believing in the person you are with, ESPECIALLY if they haven't proven to do otherwise
maybe if we all started off as friends FIRST in a relationship then we would really know the character of our partners and be able to trust their judgement and be more sound in their friendships...
true others have abused this title of "friends" before and YES sometimes friends become more than that...but if you are in a relationship shouldn't you trust that it won't go down like that?
i don't know people, speak to me
Sunday, February 17, 2008
dignity is a choice
those are the words that i heard this weekend, while sitting at home, recoping and they really struck a chord you know
i have said this many times that we have choices to make in life, we chose to be happy or sad...yea sometimes its harder to make the choice because other people or circumstances around you seem to make the choice for you...but still in the end it all boils down to how YOU react to something and how YOU handle what troubles life throws your way...
so i chose to be dignified and understand that i am not perfect, but that i love me in my perfect imperfections...that i'll be hurt sometimes and sometimes i'll hurt others...but that as long as my heart is in the right place and as long as i am willing to keep trying to be the BEST TC that i can be...that's all i can do
you can't change how others see things, you can't change how others feel...the only thing you can do is pick yourself up and dust yourself off and keep going...
so i guess i'll put on my "BIG GURL DRAWERS" and keep it moving...
there is a lot that i don't particularly like about my life right now, but I am going to take the necessary steps to make the necessary changes....
because in the end, it all boils down to me...so time to make that change
i have said this many times that we have choices to make in life, we chose to be happy or sad...yea sometimes its harder to make the choice because other people or circumstances around you seem to make the choice for you...but still in the end it all boils down to how YOU react to something and how YOU handle what troubles life throws your way...
so i chose to be dignified and understand that i am not perfect, but that i love me in my perfect imperfections...that i'll be hurt sometimes and sometimes i'll hurt others...but that as long as my heart is in the right place and as long as i am willing to keep trying to be the BEST TC that i can be...that's all i can do
you can't change how others see things, you can't change how others feel...the only thing you can do is pick yourself up and dust yourself off and keep going...
so i guess i'll put on my "BIG GURL DRAWERS" and keep it moving...
there is a lot that i don't particularly like about my life right now, but I am going to take the necessary steps to make the necessary changes....
because in the end, it all boils down to me...so time to make that change
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
It takes strength
It takes strength to do what must be done when the work is unpleasant and uncomfortable.
It takes strength to persist in the face of obstacles, when it would be much easier to simply give up.
It takes strength to be polite to someone when that person has been rude to you. It takes strength to be truthful when a lie would be more convenient.
It takes strength to build for the future. It takes strength to resist temptations and distractions.
It takes strength to do what is right. It takes strength to make an effort when it would be easier to make up an excuse.
It takes strength to do all these things. And all the while, these are the very things that build even more strength.
Be truthful, do what you know is right, put forth effort when it is called for, persist, and the more you do so, the more easily you'll be able to do so. Exercise your strength, and you'll surely grow stronger, more capable, and successful in each endeavor.
-- Ralph Marston
you all know how i do, when i see something that "springs my ears forward" i want to share...right now...i am tired, stressed, and getting sick...physically and mentally and emotionally i am tired...truly tired...someone else out there might be tired too...so i thought that that i would share...
stay up!
It takes strength to persist in the face of obstacles, when it would be much easier to simply give up.
It takes strength to be polite to someone when that person has been rude to you. It takes strength to be truthful when a lie would be more convenient.
It takes strength to build for the future. It takes strength to resist temptations and distractions.
It takes strength to do what is right. It takes strength to make an effort when it would be easier to make up an excuse.
It takes strength to do all these things. And all the while, these are the very things that build even more strength.
Be truthful, do what you know is right, put forth effort when it is called for, persist, and the more you do so, the more easily you'll be able to do so. Exercise your strength, and you'll surely grow stronger, more capable, and successful in each endeavor.
-- Ralph Marston
you all know how i do, when i see something that "springs my ears forward" i want to share...right now...i am tired, stressed, and getting sick...physically and mentally and emotionally i am tired...truly tired...someone else out there might be tired too...so i thought that that i would share...
stay up!
Monday, February 11, 2008
sittin in the airport
that'll be my life for the next couple of months
lots of traveling and training and in between that writing a grant...
yea not that great...
you know what bothers me, when people say get over it when you are blown or stressed in life
"make changes" puh leeze if it was that easy wouldn't you think that i would do that...or anyone who was stressed or going through life would JUST do that...
i so wish life was that easy...
but i guess you should just make a way to "get over it" you can't necessarily get over it, but you can take steps to get past whatever it is that you are dealing with...but boy oh boy does that take time and reflection and space...none of which i really have right now...
count it all joy though because it could totally be worse...life could always be worse
so when i vent or whatever its jus that...
but isn't that what YOU can do...if that's what YOU want to do
yea i am im a pissy mood...traveling and starting to get sick would make anyone cranky...lol
anywho...let's exercise our right to vote DC/MD/VA...
so i didn't get to finish because i had to board my flight...
anywho...
on good thing about being in New Orleans on Friday and North Carolina on Monday....i saw these BAD pumps....this young business savy strong sistah had on these
suede stiletto slingback peeptoe platform pumps by Cole Hahn....
BAD
she had on a BAD suite to match too...
yea that was the highlight
you know whatelse...i actually like that dumb friggin song....dey know...NOT because of dude, he is wack as all get out...but i LUV the horns, the beat...that thang is crazy
this pretty much turned into rAdomneSS huh?
oh and by the way....i don't like you...yea you....i do NOT like you...kick rocks.....
im out
lots of traveling and training and in between that writing a grant...
yea not that great...
you know what bothers me, when people say get over it when you are blown or stressed in life
"make changes" puh leeze if it was that easy wouldn't you think that i would do that...or anyone who was stressed or going through life would JUST do that...
i so wish life was that easy...
but i guess you should just make a way to "get over it" you can't necessarily get over it, but you can take steps to get past whatever it is that you are dealing with...but boy oh boy does that take time and reflection and space...none of which i really have right now...
count it all joy though because it could totally be worse...life could always be worse
so when i vent or whatever its jus that...
but isn't that what YOU can do...if that's what YOU want to do
yea i am im a pissy mood...traveling and starting to get sick would make anyone cranky...lol
anywho...let's exercise our right to vote DC/MD/VA...
so i didn't get to finish because i had to board my flight...
anywho...
on good thing about being in New Orleans on Friday and North Carolina on Monday....i saw these BAD pumps....this young business savy strong sistah had on these
suede stiletto slingback peeptoe platform pumps by Cole Hahn....
BAD
she had on a BAD suite to match too...
yea that was the highlight
you know whatelse...i actually like that dumb friggin song....dey know...NOT because of dude, he is wack as all get out...but i LUV the horns, the beat...that thang is crazy
this pretty much turned into rAdomneSS huh?
oh and by the way....i don't like you...yea you....i do NOT like you...kick rocks.....
im out
Tuesday, February 05, 2008
okay: "don't play her small"
real talk i have NEVER been Oprah fan...
now don't get me wrong i totally respect lady O...
but i wasn't one of those people that went home everyday to watch her show...
but this right here, she put it down...if you didn't know, now you do...
my respect level for her has like tripled! and i am now totally a FAN!
holla back!
now don't get me wrong i totally respect lady O...
but i wasn't one of those people that went home everyday to watch her show...
but this right here, she put it down...if you didn't know, now you do...
my respect level for her has like tripled! and i am now totally a FAN!
holla back!
Monday, February 04, 2008
maybe its me
really it must be
i just don't feel motivated anymore i really don't
i feel like my life is passing me by and i don't know why
so many feelings and emotions are running through my head and i can't understand why they just won't stop or shut up
there is work that i need to be doing right now, but instead i feel the need to blog...
bloggin is totally my release
i have had more doctor's appointments, tests and crap run on me
i am tired...i mean really tired and i won't have a vacation anytime soon
the thing is everyone wants a piece of me and when i don't give what THEY thing they need from me its a problem...hell i need time for myself too...and it would be nice if i could vent to someone and they TRULY listen for once to what my needs are instead of venturing off into their own needs OR to cursing someone out OR whatever else that they want to do because CLEARLY my issues don't really matter
i am ready to move on in my life, certain things and repsonsiblities i am ready to let go of...the problem is no one is there to step up...but i need to let go, i am in no position to give my all right now, and my body, my spirit and my soul suffer for it why? because simply i am tired!
i don't do anything, which is fine, because basically i am beyond the whole club scene...but i want to read a good book, go to a museum, go to see some "dumb fish" go to a play...i just want to live life...
i have gotten part of my life under control and that's the eating habits and exercise part, which has been most helpful i must admit but at the same time, my skin breaks out...smh...now i have to figure out what in the world caused that..
let me just put it plainly i am stressed out...and some things in my life truly have to go
i just don't feel motivated anymore i really don't
i feel like my life is passing me by and i don't know why
so many feelings and emotions are running through my head and i can't understand why they just won't stop or shut up
there is work that i need to be doing right now, but instead i feel the need to blog...
bloggin is totally my release
i have had more doctor's appointments, tests and crap run on me
i am tired...i mean really tired and i won't have a vacation anytime soon
the thing is everyone wants a piece of me and when i don't give what THEY thing they need from me its a problem...hell i need time for myself too...and it would be nice if i could vent to someone and they TRULY listen for once to what my needs are instead of venturing off into their own needs OR to cursing someone out OR whatever else that they want to do because CLEARLY my issues don't really matter
i am ready to move on in my life, certain things and repsonsiblities i am ready to let go of...the problem is no one is there to step up...but i need to let go, i am in no position to give my all right now, and my body, my spirit and my soul suffer for it why? because simply i am tired!
i don't do anything, which is fine, because basically i am beyond the whole club scene...but i want to read a good book, go to a museum, go to see some "dumb fish" go to a play...i just want to live life...
i have gotten part of my life under control and that's the eating habits and exercise part, which has been most helpful i must admit but at the same time, my skin breaks out...smh...now i have to figure out what in the world caused that..
let me just put it plainly i am stressed out...and some things in my life truly have to go
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