the stats

...what is it?

marriage

for who, all those people that they keep doing these studies on...and it has more to do with money than spiritual reasons

so i sat and talked with two couples this weekend

both couples together for about 10 years, both couples have kids, both couples live in ONE home

and he is just as involved with his kids and she is...they are in love and WANT to be married...so then the question becomes, well why don't they just get married...

the answer: they can't afford it

a lot of young women live in homes where they receive assistance, he works, she works, but still with child care costs, etc, they can't afford to be married and lose the assistance

so what does that mean, well that means in society eyes they children belong to a single parent home, regardless that there are both parents are raising their kids and not just sitting in the house doing nothing but truly contributing to their families

further more these men are IN love with their women and are committed to them

I say all of that to say, the judgement that society and we can place on people can sometimes be overwhelming so before we assume that these studies or what we think (not know) is correct we should have conversations first

DISCLAIMER: this is not a religious debate blog, i personally prefer to be married and let it all work itself out, HOWEVER, i am also financially dependant and everyone is not afforded that opportunity...FURTHERMORE, both couples know the biblical stance, this is a post strictly about the financial aspects facing a lot of couples

sense of humor

that's what HE the man that really and truly RUNS the world

HE has a sense of humor

the very next night, after a rant, i am sitting here and i can't even imagine myself without him

he's in the ER

i am 2 hours away from him TWO

its definitely something that could be MAJOR...

he's waiting to have a scan done...

he's got an IV in his arm

i am TWO hours away...

i can't get to him RIGHT NOW

i can't move

i can't imagine life without him

i was just complaining about adulthood and NOT being ready and now i am more ready that i have ever been

i take it back...i take it all back

this is real life

P just said this: True Love = loving in spite of not because of...

adutlhood

let me first start by saying that word right there^^^up there
the title of this blog...

OVERRATED

ok so what you are saying to me is that i have to get up everyday, EVERYSINGLEDAY and go to the SAME place and do the SAME thing with the SAME people

and even if i do get another job, i will once again do the SAME THING and that the ONLY time you get to do what you truly LOVE means you won't make the money you NEED to make because of the BILLS you have mad because of that well paying job you got thinking it would be a career

OVERRATED

then you fall in love and you are supposed to get married and have a kid or two (because the economy and daycare costs and add that my mommanem done moved down souffs you can't have three) means you have to deal with not just your hubby, your kid(s) but they family too, and as much as folks say or want to think that we got the BEST family in the world, we all seem to fall short of the Huxtables, some WAYYYYY shorter than others...THEN you gotta love these people unconditionally (you know the dude you married and that baby you wanted so bad) EVEN when they plucking you ever lasting nerve that's left OR when you just want to be left the HELL alone...they still there...always still RIGHT THERE for 40-50 years...

maybe not as overrated but definitely NOT WHAT THEY MAKE IT SEEM LIKE

then you gotta pay these things called BILLS (and until you get married you gotta do that ALONE) and you are still broke...regardless it seems like something ALWAYS comes up, its not whatif, its WHEN...you get taxed out the youknowwhat...(can we say double digits already this year, so my salary is NOTHING) so that makes you WANT to get married or have a "livein" because let's see two is better than ONE esp when it comes to the monies...

Hey i said it...you might not want to but...at least that's how IFEELRIGHTNOW

did i say by now at this age my grandmanem think my eggs are about to dry up and run away...and all your friends that are younger keep saying they need to be married and have kids BY my age...and all i keep think about is how i am STILL NOT READY for a kid (another kid, i have a kid, but only part time because he lives with his dad and i haven't adopted him as of yet) and when i do have a kid that's my TWO so he needs to be 1 out of diaper AND out of daycare before i even THINK about another kid becuase he is about to cost $992 a MONTH for school ALONE...one kid, one of my co-workers pays OVER $1700 a MONTH for her ONE child...then let's add the diapers, the clothes, the shoes, the time, the energy, the drama with your mommanem telling you what THEY want you to do...yea...i need another FO (as in 4) years before i am in the house and where i want to be financially before i even THINK about having anotherbaby

so right now with dollars and cents....another kid right now OVERRATED

because the reality is we (me and the he) are going to see the WTT concert in AC this weekend, and I can't get a new fit (as in outfit) i can barely get my huurrr and nails did (as in make a hair appointment and get a mani/pani) and FORGET staying overnight who will have the energy, who can we find to babysit OVERNIGHT and who got the money for the hotel!

yea so even with seeing or having that light of sunshine at the end of the tunnel of a week of work at a place that is nothing more than a job (because let's face it a career is something you LOVE doing day in and day out, ie work for yourself doing what you want to do) and pay the rest of my mid month bills i am still dreading the drive, the cost, and the look

so by the way did i tell you that some times (not all) but A LOTof times

ADULTHOOD IS OVERRATED

need

i need to blog

i really need to blog

there is a lot going on with me but i don't know where to begin

hopefully i'll be able to have some time this weekend to do a MAJOR brain dumb...

hopefully i'll want to

until laters